


My Pretty Weeper

by terrifiedatbest



Series: writing practice (joshler) [2]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Angst, Confessions, Cuddling, Depression, Divorce, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Love, M/M, Regret, Self-Hatred, Short Story, Winter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-24
Updated: 2018-06-24
Packaged: 2019-05-27 23:19:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15035507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terrifiedatbest/pseuds/terrifiedatbest
Summary: Tyler was a mess.Josh wasn't much better.blue lips & soft skin





	My Pretty Weeper

His crooked teeth were chattering loudly. Josh's hand reached out to cup his rosy cheek with cold fingers. 

“Tyler, your lips are blue.” 

Tyler nodded his heavy skull. He knew. He knew his lips were discolored. He knew the bags under his eyes were more pronounced than ever before. He knew his hair was matted up in the least attractive way. He knew.

“J-josh, I m-miss you.” He breathed out, the cold getting to him. Snow was beginning to gather in Josh's delicate brown eyelashes, and if it was possible he looked even more angelic than usual.

“Come inside.” Josh murmered, gripping Tyler's numb hand and leading him into his house. The warmth inside was at a strange contrast with his cold skin. 

“I’m gonna make you some hot chocolate.” 

Tyler barely heard him over the buzzing in his head and he hardly noticed him heading into the kitchen. His attention was directed towards the pictures hanging on Josh's wall. Those pictures made him want to freeze to death. Or burn alive. Either way, he’d end up feeling nothing. He caught himself before his chewed up fingernails dug too deep into the flesh on his fragile arm, lifting them away from his limb slowly. He sighed, but it hurt to do so. He wanted to spit on those pictures, stomp on the frames until his foot bled, burn the papers until it was like they never existed at all. The pictures were of a certain brown haired girl kissing Josh, hugging him, touching him, getting  _ too close to him _ . He wanted to punch the wall they hung upon.

“Hey.” Josh spoke gently so as not to startle Tyler when he reentered the room. 

Tyler's reaction was delayed, but when he eventually willed his body to turn around and face Josh he was surprised to see his warm hazel eyes fixed shyly on the white cup in his hands. 

“Here you go.” He said, handing Tyler the hot mug, trying not to let their fingers brush together. 

“Thanks.” Tyler whispered, giving in and allowing his hands to warm up against the clay. 

“Take a seat.” Josh offered, sitting on the couch on the opposite side of the room. Tyler sat down on the nearest chair, holding the cup close to his chest. He let the steam float up, the scent of cinnamon calming him down a little. His eyes slipped closed for a moment, and it was harder to reopen them than he'd expected.

“So.. uh, how’s the divorce going?”

Tyler let out a shaking breath. “Not well. I haven't been turning in paperwork on time. Jenna's getting mad.”

“Sorry, dude. I know you're going through a hard time.” There was a pause before he added nervously, “I want to be close again, Ty.”

Tyler shook his head. “I… I can't, Josh.”

“Why not?” Tyler looked up and wanted to hit himself when he saw the pain in Josh's eyes. 

“I just  _ can't _ .”

“Can you at least tell me the truth? Just for today?”

“Fine.”

“Promise you won't lie?”

“Promise.”

“ _ Why _ are you and Jenna getting divorced?”

Tyler’s eyes glazed over. He couldn't remember what to say. His brain was so foggy and he didn't know how to talk anymore. He found the words eventually.

“I don't know. It wasn't working out.”

Josh only shook his head. “The truth.”

Tyler looked away, setting his cup down on the coffee table beside him. He fidgeted clumsily with his sweatshirt’s strings for a moment too long before responding. 

“I have feelings for someone else.” He mumbled. He was so angry at himself. He ruined everything. His marriage, his friendship, his music. Everything he had that he loved was slipping out of his grasp and it was all his fault. He couldn't hold back his tears. He covered his eyes with a hand in hopes that Josh wouldn't notice. Wouldn't see his desperation.

“How's Debby?” He asked, voice cracking badly. He tried not to let the bitterness he felt speaking her name drip into his tone, but it was so obvious regardless.

“She's doing good. She's out working for the next couple days.”

“Yeah.” Tyler replied dryly.

“You don't have to pretend to like her.”

“What?”

“I'm not clueless.”

Tyler simply looked up at him. “Sorry.”

“It's okay.” Josh reassured him. 

Tyler started crying again. Josh frowned, standing up and walking over to him. The chair Tyler sat in was small, but there was enough room for Josh to sit down and pull Tyler’s fragile body onto his lap. 

Tyler only cried more, hating himself for the thoughts that came into his head at the contact.

“You’re okay.” Josh whispered into his ear, arms wrapped around his torso like a seatbelt. Tyler felt Josh's careful breath fan across his neck. 

“Have you been hurting yourself?” Josh asked in the quietest voice.

Tyler didn't speak, just let out a strangled sob. 

“Oh, Ty.” Josh mumbled, hugging him tighter.

“I'm s-so sorry.” 

“Hey, hey.” Josh murmured. “Look at me.” 

Tyler listened, flitting, tired eyes meeting Josh's.

“I don't want to hurt you.” Josh's voice was so sweet, so gentle it tore Tyler apart. 

“You haven't hurt me.”

“Tyler.” Josh shook his head.

“I just- it's not your fault.”

“I know that's not true.”

“It is.”

“It isn't.” 

“It i-” Tyler was interrupted by Josh's hand under his chin tilting his head towards him and soft lips pressing into his own.

When Josh moved away, it was only to whisper “I love you”. Then he was kissing Tyler again, slow and gentle. 

Tyler's mind couldn't properly process what was happening. All he knew was that Josh tasted like strawberries and the sun, and that his heart ached.

“You love me?”

“I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

“I know.” Josh grinned. He didn't look happy.

“What about Debby?”

“I don't know. I'll think about that later. For now- come to bed with me.”

“W-what?” Tyler almost choked on his own spit. 

“Oh no- not like that. You look tired, I doubt you've been sleeping much. I want you to sleep. I'll hold you.”

“Yeah.”

“Sound good?”

“Yeah.”

Josh brought Tyler to his bedroom. It was colder than the living room, but Josh helped to wrap Tyler up under the off-white sheets, holding him closer to make up for the cooler air.

In the dark, all Tyler could think about was Josh. He was too tired to think of anything else.

Josh nestled into Tyler's neck, spooning him and whispering things Tyler forgot when he fell asleep. 

“I'll always be here for you.” Josh breathed as Tyler finally drifted off to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Almost a year since the hiatus started. We're almost there.  
> Thanks for reading.  
> If you ever need to talk or if you just want to follow me my personal acc on Instagram is @redisanicecolor  
> My art acc is @terrifiedatbest  
> My fan acc is @iowntylerslane  
> Stay strong, friends <3


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